By LeeAnn Sharpe
The Civility Solution by P.M. Forni, published 2008 from St. Martin’s Press
ISBN 0-312-36849-6, has 166 pages.
This book answers many questions with an extremely civil attitude that common sense dictates to most people, but frequently seems to be lost in today’s world.
P. M. Forni, the award winning professor of Italian literature at Johns Hopkins University, has founded a Civility Institute. His 2002 book Choosing Civility has sold over a hundred thousand copies proving that what was once taught from childhood, has been lost for generations, and now must be learned by adults unaware that civility is what drives peaceful co-existence.
It’s no wonder we live in times where road rage and sideline parents at sporting events results in violence. Keeping one's cool in tense situations seems to be deemed as weak.
Forni’s book offers Eight Rules for a Civil Life that I find so simply elegant as to be words to live by.
1. Slow down and be present in your life. It sounds so easy but who among us isn’t guilty of rushing to get everything done. And isn’t that generally when civility flies out the window?
2. Listen to the voice of empathy. I know it can be hard when the creep you are trying to empathize with has just stolen your parking place, but it will do you more good to let it go.
3. Keep a positive attitude. No one likes a downer. Positive breeds happy and happy breeds joy and joy breeds… well you know.
4. Respect others and offer them plenty of validation. This goes exceptionally well for a child or spouse. But it applies to the rest of the world as well.
5. Disagree graciously and refrain from arguing. This is pretty much the most important chapter in this book in learning how to be civil. The book is worth it just for this one chapter!
6. Get to know the people around you. How many people don’t know their neighbors these days? There you are.
7. Pay attention to the small things. My Dad goes crazy when he works so hard to maintain his clean yard and the wind blows his neighbors unkempt leaves over. It may be a small thing but it leads to a loss of civility.
8. Ask, don’t tell. Wouldn’t we all enjoy a bit more civility in the world?
Retails for $19.95 at all fine booksellers today.
About the author: LeeAnn Sharpe is a freelance writer residing in Glendale, Arizona. Her love of the southwest and the western lifestyle have inspired her to a project called Keeping the Spirit of the Old West Alive. She also writes reviews on books and dining as well as several biographies of influential people.
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